Preparing for Active Duty
Now that you know me a little better, I figure I can start catching you up to where I am now. A lot has happened since my husband commissioned. He went active duty at the beginning of this year, we did a DITY move to Fort Benning, Georgia, and my husband has already hit week 4 of IBOLC training. But to start with catching up, I figure I can tell you a little about what I did, and wish I'd done, in preparation for my husband going active duty and us reporting to Fort Benning.
My husband received his orders just over a year before he would report to Fort Benning. That gave him enough time to graduate (he had already finished the Army ROTC program), for us to court and get married, and to start the process of really developing our relationship as a married couple. I recognize these are luxuries that many other newlyweds in the military don't have. We certainly were blessed with the timing of everything.
I began asking questions, trying to understand better what to expect with military life. My husband hadn't ever been active duty, so he didn't know all the answers to my questions, which is understandable. Fortunately, my cousin has been in the air force for several years and I was able to talk with his wife extensively to understand better what to expect. (I know it's different between branches, but it still gave me a good general idea.) There are also TONS of facebook pages that you can find and join to get information from hundreds of others who have lived the military life for several years. For example, I'm a part of three separate facebook pages dedicated to Fort Benning Spouses, Families, and Officer's wives. I'm also a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, so I'm a part of the Mormon Military Members page on facebook. Find the facebook groups for the bases you're going to. They are such a huge help and wonderful resource for information. You don't have to be embarrassed about questions. All of us have been there before and I've never met kinder, more willing participants. We have a bond here in the military, and it's one I'm growing to deeply appreciate.
Additionally, if your spouse is part of an ROTC program, chances are the ROTC group holds occasional FRG meetings (Family Readiness Group). Go to them. It was a great introduction to me for what to expect with military life. I've learned that, as an officer's wife, when we report to our first station, and all the stations after that, I, as the wife of an officer in charge of a platoon, will be responsible for coordinating and holding FRG meetings for the spouses in my husband's platoon. A little intimidating, yes. But it'll be a great opportunity for me to serve alongside my husband at least in some way. Now, I don't know everything yet, but I'm slowly figuring things out.
Ok. So here's probably where the list of do's and should have done's come in when preparing to report. Get your military spouse ID card before you travel. That will get your DEERS account set up, and give you access to the base. Plus, you need that for pretty much everything else-Tricare, Dental, the Commissary, everything. It's pretty much what links you to your spouse serving in the military so you get all the perks available to you. We tried to get our ID cards before leaving. We went to the National Guard base close to our residence. However, my husband's CAC card (a much cooler card than the spouse card we get) was expired and I guess the Army had put him in the Reserves because of how much time he had between getting his orders and reporting. So we both got a reserves ID card, which did get my DEERS account set up, but wasn't the permanent ID we both needed. We had to wait till we got on base to do that, and even then, had some problems. So if you can get that done before leaving, do it. It'll save you time and the stress and hassle of trying to get there to get it taken care of.
Figure out as early as you can what kind of move you want to do. You've got three choices: have the Army move you, do a DITY (do it yourself) move, or do a partial DITY move. Regardless of what you choose, find and go to your transportation office as soon as possible to get things rolling. We decided to do a DITY move. We tried contacting the transportation office, but no one answered or called us back. So we just did the best we could, and are still trying to take care of the kinks from it. It's annoying.
There are perks and disadvantages to both. I'll start with what I know about having the Army move you. For one thing, you don't pay for them to move your stuff. They'll cover it. They'll come in with a moving truck, load all your stuff, and send it to where it needs to go. (That may be different for overseas, but I'm not entirely sure. I'll update you on that as I learn more about it. Fortunately, most people reading this are probably in the same boat as I was, so knowing more about the overseas move probably won't be necessary yet.) The main disadvantage I've heard about this kind of move is that you won't get your stuff for several weeks after moving. You'll arrive to you new home, but your stuff won't get there for a while.
Doing a full DITY move isn't bad. You rent a truck, weigh it empty, load it, weigh it full, and move yourself. Along the way, you have to keep all your receipts for gas, hotels, and possibly even food. You also have to keep your receipts from the weigh station. We went through Budget because it was cheaper than Uhaul and got a tow dolley to tow our car behind the truck instead of having to drive separately. DITY moves are a lot of work and can be stressful. But the nice thing is, once you get to where you're going, you go to the transportation office with all your receipts and turn everything in and you'll get compensated up to 95% of what it would have cost the Army to move you. They also pay you by weight and distance traveled. If things go as they're supposed to, we're looking at gaining an extra $2000-$3000 beyond what we spent on our DITY move. It's not a bad gig. And you just pocket whatever extra you receive!
Finally, the partial DITY is basically a combination of the previous two moves. You have the Army move most of your stuff, but you also move some of your own stuff in your own car and the Army will compensate you for the weight and distance you travel with your stuff. This is nice because it's less stressful than a full DITY move, and allows you to carry some of the basic essentials to live off of while you wait for the rest of your stuff to arrive.
My last thought for today is figuring out housing. Look at what housing is available where you're moving to. Do you want to live on base or off base? Off base is typically cheaper, which means you pocket whatever extra you get for your BAH (basic housing allowance) from the Army. But on base can be pretty convenient. We chose to live on base and it's great! My husband works about 5 minutes away from home, which means he can sometimes come home for lunch or when he has a break in his schedule. We still get a couple hundred dollars back on our BAH because of where we chose to live on base, but we don't keep quite as much as others living off base probably do. If you choose to live on base, they usually have different housing options depending on your spouse's rank. My husband is an O1 right now so we could choose on base housing designated for O1. What we got was amazing; I absolutely love where we live! But we are quite fortunate. I've heard most everyone else just has to give up their entire BAH to live on base. It's kind of like living in the dorms at a college university. It's ridiculously expensive, but convenient. You can learn more about the housing options available to you on those facebook pages dedicated to the base you're reporting to. We chose on base for the convenience and it's been really good for us. It's helped us adjust to military life and I love seeing my husband anything he can come home early. Another thing to consider is timing. If you choose to live on base, there often is a waiting period before housing becomes available. Figure it out in advance. Call ahead, and get your name on a list if that's what's necessary. You don't want to be stuck with zero housing when you arrive. While the Army does house you in a hotel for up to 10 days while you try to find housing, it's much easier to find something beforehand, knowing it'll be ready and available when you need it.
So those are some of the big things that could help make the adjustment from civilian life to military life easier for you. As you have read, there are some things I think went well for us. And there are some things I wish we had done differently. Hopefully it'll be helpful for you! And with that, I'll close up this post and come back again tomorrow!
My husband received his orders just over a year before he would report to Fort Benning. That gave him enough time to graduate (he had already finished the Army ROTC program), for us to court and get married, and to start the process of really developing our relationship as a married couple. I recognize these are luxuries that many other newlyweds in the military don't have. We certainly were blessed with the timing of everything.
I began asking questions, trying to understand better what to expect with military life. My husband hadn't ever been active duty, so he didn't know all the answers to my questions, which is understandable. Fortunately, my cousin has been in the air force for several years and I was able to talk with his wife extensively to understand better what to expect. (I know it's different between branches, but it still gave me a good general idea.) There are also TONS of facebook pages that you can find and join to get information from hundreds of others who have lived the military life for several years. For example, I'm a part of three separate facebook pages dedicated to Fort Benning Spouses, Families, and Officer's wives. I'm also a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, so I'm a part of the Mormon Military Members page on facebook. Find the facebook groups for the bases you're going to. They are such a huge help and wonderful resource for information. You don't have to be embarrassed about questions. All of us have been there before and I've never met kinder, more willing participants. We have a bond here in the military, and it's one I'm growing to deeply appreciate.
Additionally, if your spouse is part of an ROTC program, chances are the ROTC group holds occasional FRG meetings (Family Readiness Group). Go to them. It was a great introduction to me for what to expect with military life. I've learned that, as an officer's wife, when we report to our first station, and all the stations after that, I, as the wife of an officer in charge of a platoon, will be responsible for coordinating and holding FRG meetings for the spouses in my husband's platoon. A little intimidating, yes. But it'll be a great opportunity for me to serve alongside my husband at least in some way. Now, I don't know everything yet, but I'm slowly figuring things out.
Ok. So here's probably where the list of do's and should have done's come in when preparing to report. Get your military spouse ID card before you travel. That will get your DEERS account set up, and give you access to the base. Plus, you need that for pretty much everything else-Tricare, Dental, the Commissary, everything. It's pretty much what links you to your spouse serving in the military so you get all the perks available to you. We tried to get our ID cards before leaving. We went to the National Guard base close to our residence. However, my husband's CAC card (a much cooler card than the spouse card we get) was expired and I guess the Army had put him in the Reserves because of how much time he had between getting his orders and reporting. So we both got a reserves ID card, which did get my DEERS account set up, but wasn't the permanent ID we both needed. We had to wait till we got on base to do that, and even then, had some problems. So if you can get that done before leaving, do it. It'll save you time and the stress and hassle of trying to get there to get it taken care of.
Figure out as early as you can what kind of move you want to do. You've got three choices: have the Army move you, do a DITY (do it yourself) move, or do a partial DITY move. Regardless of what you choose, find and go to your transportation office as soon as possible to get things rolling. We decided to do a DITY move. We tried contacting the transportation office, but no one answered or called us back. So we just did the best we could, and are still trying to take care of the kinks from it. It's annoying.
There are perks and disadvantages to both. I'll start with what I know about having the Army move you. For one thing, you don't pay for them to move your stuff. They'll cover it. They'll come in with a moving truck, load all your stuff, and send it to where it needs to go. (That may be different for overseas, but I'm not entirely sure. I'll update you on that as I learn more about it. Fortunately, most people reading this are probably in the same boat as I was, so knowing more about the overseas move probably won't be necessary yet.) The main disadvantage I've heard about this kind of move is that you won't get your stuff for several weeks after moving. You'll arrive to you new home, but your stuff won't get there for a while.
Doing a full DITY move isn't bad. You rent a truck, weigh it empty, load it, weigh it full, and move yourself. Along the way, you have to keep all your receipts for gas, hotels, and possibly even food. You also have to keep your receipts from the weigh station. We went through Budget because it was cheaper than Uhaul and got a tow dolley to tow our car behind the truck instead of having to drive separately. DITY moves are a lot of work and can be stressful. But the nice thing is, once you get to where you're going, you go to the transportation office with all your receipts and turn everything in and you'll get compensated up to 95% of what it would have cost the Army to move you. They also pay you by weight and distance traveled. If things go as they're supposed to, we're looking at gaining an extra $2000-$3000 beyond what we spent on our DITY move. It's not a bad gig. And you just pocket whatever extra you receive!
Finally, the partial DITY is basically a combination of the previous two moves. You have the Army move most of your stuff, but you also move some of your own stuff in your own car and the Army will compensate you for the weight and distance you travel with your stuff. This is nice because it's less stressful than a full DITY move, and allows you to carry some of the basic essentials to live off of while you wait for the rest of your stuff to arrive.
My last thought for today is figuring out housing. Look at what housing is available where you're moving to. Do you want to live on base or off base? Off base is typically cheaper, which means you pocket whatever extra you get for your BAH (basic housing allowance) from the Army. But on base can be pretty convenient. We chose to live on base and it's great! My husband works about 5 minutes away from home, which means he can sometimes come home for lunch or when he has a break in his schedule. We still get a couple hundred dollars back on our BAH because of where we chose to live on base, but we don't keep quite as much as others living off base probably do. If you choose to live on base, they usually have different housing options depending on your spouse's rank. My husband is an O1 right now so we could choose on base housing designated for O1. What we got was amazing; I absolutely love where we live! But we are quite fortunate. I've heard most everyone else just has to give up their entire BAH to live on base. It's kind of like living in the dorms at a college university. It's ridiculously expensive, but convenient. You can learn more about the housing options available to you on those facebook pages dedicated to the base you're reporting to. We chose on base for the convenience and it's been really good for us. It's helped us adjust to military life and I love seeing my husband anything he can come home early. Another thing to consider is timing. If you choose to live on base, there often is a waiting period before housing becomes available. Figure it out in advance. Call ahead, and get your name on a list if that's what's necessary. You don't want to be stuck with zero housing when you arrive. While the Army does house you in a hotel for up to 10 days while you try to find housing, it's much easier to find something beforehand, knowing it'll be ready and available when you need it.
So those are some of the big things that could help make the adjustment from civilian life to military life easier for you. As you have read, there are some things I think went well for us. And there are some things I wish we had done differently. Hopefully it'll be helpful for you! And with that, I'll close up this post and come back again tomorrow!
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